Why Arranged Marriages Might Just Be a Good Thing

chelsea and me

Ok, not really; but I do wish I had the right to “audition” my daughter’s boyfriends sometimes.  Here’s a conversation we had a few years ago that will tell you why I feel that way:


“….yeah, yeah, Chels. Next time you choose a boyfriend, can you please pick someone who’s sane?”

“In the mid-Ohio valley? He’s not my boyfriend, anyhow.”

“Well, maybe you should watch where you meet these guys.”

“I met him on Facebook.  Oh, no, I forgot! I met him in the alley by the Locker Room…” (a bar)

“That shoulda been your first clue.”

“…and my friend said to him, ‘How old do you think she is?’  and he said, ‘Old enough.'”

“OK! There was your second clue!”

“MOM! He couldn’t help it! He was drunk!”

“Clue three.  Sounds like a prince among men.”

“Wasn’t that Jesus?”

“NO. Jesus is the KING.”

“Oh, I thought he was the Prince of Tides or something.”


“Didn’t he part the sea or something?”

“Well…that was Moses.”

“Aren’t they all the same? The Father, Ghost, and Jesus?”

“Still not getting Moses out of that…”


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